Mark Pulisic was a freshman on George Mason University’s men’s soccer team in 1986 when he befriended junior midfielder Bob Lilley.

More than 30 years later, the relationship that has seen the two compete as professional teammates both on the field and on the sidelines, in addition to firm friends away from the field, has never been stronger. 

Reunited at the Rochester Rhinos, the addition of Pulisic to the club’s coaching staff as his assistant is a welcome one for Lilley as the club prepares for its home opener this weekend against the New York Red Bulls II.

“This is for sure the closest assistant I’ve ever had, and I think it’s a dynamic that will help our team, and it will help me too,” said Lilley of his new assistant coach. “I think I tend sometimes to be rigid, and I’m pretty high-strung and Mark’s a little bit more laid back, but we both have high expectations. We’re both extremely competitive. We just go about it different ways. It’s a unique thing to have him here on board. I’m excited about it. It’s gone great so far.”

Both Lilley and Pulisic still hold a place in the George Mason record book. Lilley’s 82 appearances for the Patriots place him second behind only former MLS defender Ritchie Kotschau, while Pulisic’s 35 goals place him sixth all-time in program history.

The likeness of vision, when it came not only to soccer but to life, was what brought the two together off the field, though.

“We respect each other. We had similar ideas and values both on and off the field,” said Pulisic. “I think we just get along very well, and we understand each other’s faults as well. He’s been close with my family for so many years as well, so that’s been another big part of it.”

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After playing together for two seasons with the Patriots, the two reunited for the first time professionally in indoor soccer with the Harrisburg Heat – Pulisic lived with Lilley and also helped him coach at Dickinson College before getting a head coaching position of his own at fellow NCAA Division III school Lebanon Valley College.

It was with the Flying Dutchmen that Pulisic began to create his coaching bona fides, helping not only build the college’s men’s program into a competitive unit, but also establishing a women’s program too. Lilley was also there on campus, as his first foray into professional coaching with the Hershey Wildcats saw the club train at the nearby campus.

“We used Lebanon Valley’s fields one year and Mark would be driving around the fields in a golf cart with his two kids watching practice,” Lilley recalled. “Christian’s like four or five years old and they’re watching training.”

Their paths diverged for a while, although Pulisic would visit Lilley when he was in Montreal as Head Coach for the Impact. Pulisic’s path kept him closer to home in central Pennsylvania, where a new club run by another former teammate was just coming to life. Bill Becher, another teammate of Pulisic’s with the Heat, had been appointed the Head Coach of the Harrisburg City Islanders, and was looking for help.

“I had a great experience there when I first started in 2004 for those first two years,” said Pulisic. “It was a great experience learning from Billy, learning from a perspective in my hometown there. … I had a great start and a great mentor with the City Islanders, and now I have one here with Rochester. I’m very fortunate to have that.”

Entering the Arena

The indoor game brought Pulisic and Lilley back together again briefly, with Pulisic hiring Lilley to be his Head Coach at the Detroit Ignition ahead of the 2007-08 Major Indoor Soccer League season after the club’s former GM had moved on to join the WNBA’s Washington Mystics. Both led the team to a regular-season championship.

“Mark said to me, ‘Why don’t you come in here? I can’t be the coach and GM, it’s too much. You can work with the guys and be the coach and I’ll step upstairs and handle the GM stuff,’” Lilley said. “So we worked together for one season in Detroit, won the regular season title, did well, but that league was in complete turmoil at that point, so then I came back to Pennsylvania.”

It wasn’t long before Lilley was back on a USL sideline, this time with the Rochester Rhinos. For Pulisic, though, matters closer to home were starting to take precedence. The emergence of his son, Christian, with PA Classics began to draw attention from national team scouts. U.S. Youth National Team call-ups arrived, then U.S. U17 Residency at IMG Academy, before finally the move to Borussia Dortmund.

Pulisic had been overseas with his prodigiously talented son before. Lilley recalls visiting them when they were in England for a spell, but in Germany as Christian made his mark on the field, Mark took the opportunity to expand his horizons as a coach as well.

“In Dortmund I was fortunate to watch the First Team train every day,” said Pulisic. “You pick up little things, you understand that every coach is a little bit different, does things a little bit different, but for sure I picked up things in Germany, whether it was different types of training sessions or player management, just how to get through a season, stay healthy, rest players, just the whole management of teams. You have your own ideas. I learned things here in the States, but I’ve been fortunate to go overseas and see that.”

Reunion in Rochester

With his son turning 18, and blooming into the new face of the U.S. National Team, Pulisic was ready to get his coaching career back underway. With Lilley having staff turnover this offseason, the conversation turned toward Pulisic joining him first at the MLS Combine this January, and then to joining the staff.

As the two parted company in California – Lilley to return to Rochester, Pulisic to Germany – Pulisic said a week later he’d have his decision. In the end, it was a simple one.

“We had a good discussion about me coming on board, and we thought it would be a good chance for me to get back into the U.S., because I need to be here with my family, and I want to get back to coaching at the professional level,” said Pulisic. “There’s no one I’d rather learn from as far as players in the league and how things are run than from someone who’s had such experience and success, so I jumped on it.”

Lilley and Pulisic are now working together to maintain the success the Rhinos have established over their history. The 2015 USL Cup championship crown, the fourth in the club’s history, was another landmark achievement, and Pulisic believes he and Lilley will work well together as they have in the past to maintain the standard at Capelli Sport Stadium.

“Working with Bob, together we have some ideas as to how we want the whole season to progress,” said Pulisic. “It’s not just one game here, or the first five games. I think while I’m helping him, he’s helping me understand it’s a long season, so we need to manage our players, we need to rotate players and get to know our players now, and we’ve done that the first few games.”

Understanding, Friendship Endure

In addition to that, though, they’re also making sure a lifelong friendship continues to play a major part in their lives away from the field.

“The good thing is we know each other well enough that we can have a strong discussion or difference of opinion – because on certain things he thinks we should do it this way, and I think we should do it this way – and we can have those discussions and come to a consensus,” said Lilley. “For sure, sometimes I have to make a final decision, but we can move on the next day.”

“As we’re working with the team, there will be things we disagree about,” added Pulisic. “We’ve already had those discussions, he feels one way, I feel another way, but it’s all healthy and it’s why he has help. I think it’s just understanding that once we leave the building and once we leave the field, and once we’re together and he’s with my family, soccer’s on the back burner.

“We do separate it pretty well, and understand we need to forget about the game sometimes in order to stay fresh and not affect our true relationship, which is a big friendship.”